I am so glad that I stumbled onto this article as it helped me feel better about this exact thing. While being pregnant over the summer, I became a little lazy. Most of my days were spent lounging around the house doing absolutely nothing. Some days I wouldn't even get dressed and I spent all day on the couch. Some days I would feel fine not doing anything because hey, I was pregnant and growing a baby inside of me. I needed to relax. Other days, Scott would come home from work and I'd feel guilty about not getting to my to-do list. Especially when there were important baby items to buy and a nursery to finish.
Fast forward to today and you'd see the same scene. This time, I spend more days in my pajamas while sometimes going too many days without a shower. My to-do list is quite long as I still haven't recovered from family coming into town two weeks ago. It is a guessing game on when the items on my list will be crossed off. Just a few days ago, I finally tackled cleaning my kitchen, but today you can't even tell. Our family room is a mess of baby items already. I feel like I just can't keep up. The list keeps getting longer and longer which makes it less appealing to get to.
The only thing I get to everyday on my to-do list is taking care of Kylie. She can definitely be a handful some days. She sometimes has a hard time burping and passing gas, so it takes a bit for her to go down for a nap after eating. Since she is upset from gas and becoming over tired, I usually soothe her to sleep in my arms where she stays, at the risk of waking her up.
I know that taking care of a baby takes time, but trying to get back into the habit of life before she came (heck, even before pregnancy) has proven difficult. The article states that one thing I am doing all day is becoming a mother. I never thought about it that way, but I am. I am learning to listen and understand my baby's needs more clearly. I am learning what needs to be done to make sure she is taken care of. I am learning ways to show my love to her. I am learning how to be a mother and a wife. I am learning that motherhood is a balancing act and it takes time to stay balanced.
I love the last part of this article.
"But here’s where it gets interesting: As much as you need and want a break now (and you should take one, more on that later), no mother has ever looked back on this time and thought, “I wish I had held my baby less.” You will not remember the dishes that didn’t get done, the vacuuming that you just couldn’t make happen, or the dirty clothes you wore more often than you’d like to admit. You will remember the first smile, the first belly laugh, the first words, the first steps. You will remember the way you looked at your baby, and the way your baby looked at you.
So the next time you find yourself wondering how another day is gone and nothing is done, stop. Hold your baby—feel the way that tiny body strains to contain this giant soul—complete, and full of potential all at the same time. Take a deep, slow breath. Close your eyes and measure your day not as tasks, but as feelings, as sounds, as colors. Exhaustion is part of it. And it’s true, you will get “nothing” done. But the hard parts will fade. The intense, burning love is what remains, and it is yours to keep forever."
So, next time I am holding my sleeping girl in my arms, I will just enjoy the moment.
No comments:
Post a Comment