This past month, I have never felt so stressed out in my life. Seriously, I cannot think of a previous time where I have been as stressed out as this. Even planning my wedding was not this stressful. I have been on such an emotional roller coaster and Scott is definitely learning some things about me that I'm sure he didn't know before. Good thing marriage is all about the positive and negative things about a person, right? Anyways, this thing that is always on my mind and stressing me out is buying a home. Yes, Scott and I are looking into purchasing our first home.
The thought of buying a home was actually very random and surprising. I will say that Scott was the sole reason for this thought coming into our heads. He just started looking up homes one day for fun and it suddenly turned into calling a real estate agent to go looking for homes. I'm not going to lie, I don't think we did all our research on buying a home before we started looking. When Scott gets a thought into his head, it is all he thinks about. He gets very excited and sometimes doesn't think realistically about certain aspects of what he's excited about. So, that can be a problem, but it's also great that he is not afraid to go for things that might be a little scary or out of the comfort zone.
Obviously, buying a home is way outside of the comfort zone. "It's the biggest investment and most money you'll spend in your life" is what we keep hearing from everyone we've talked to. That is scary stuff to hear! It was fun at first to look at houses with Scott and figure out what we liked and didn't like in a home. What was a deal breaker and what we could be fine living with. It was fun to think about being able to decorate my home how I wish. No one telling me what I can and can't do with the place I was living in. It was fun to think that we could now get another cat without worry. Whenever we would start a family, we knew that we would have space. Scott could finally do what he wanted with the yard and plant a garden and his fruit cocktail tree. It was great to think about being somewhere permanent, without worry of where we would be living from year to year. I think because of all these fun things about a home, we forgot to do our research.
We went out and started looking at homes and found one that seemed very nice that we liked a lot. Our real estate agent called the next day saying that an offer got put on the house, but no back up offer. We started to get worried and decided to be the back up offer. Say what?! I know, I know. Probably not the smartest thing to do considering we knew nothing about how much things would really cost. We have not heard back about the house we put an offer on.
Putting in the back up offer really set things off with me. I started freaking out...a lot. And I'm still freaking out....a lot. The main thing that is scaring me the most is all the financial burdens of buying a home. It really is the most expensive thing you will ever buy and own in your life. I have to keep being constantly comforted and reminded by Scott that we will be okay and things will work out fine.
I had a little break down last night and was just crying and crying over how worried I am that we won't have enough money, we're going to buy the wrong house, etc. After I was finished, I realized that I need to have more faith and trust. It sounds so easy, but it is hard for me to have faith in something so huge, which is probably why I need to have it. I think that now that I have discovered this, I hopefully won't break down as much. (Really crossing fingers here on this one...I HATE being stressed out.)
Scott and I have researched so much more into buying a home, which has helped in making me feel better. We have gotten so much advice and support from family. It still seems a little crazy to me that we would be buying a home after only a year and a half of marriage, but it does feel like it should be the next step in our married life (despite my frequent break downs).
So, here's to faith and trust that there will be no problems with money, that we will find a home in the time period we have, that we will get a home in the right area and that we will buy a home that suits who we are...Scott & Emily Fletcher.
Good luck to us!
Yes indeed! Good luck to you!! I am glad you have a buyer's agent, that will help you a lot. I am reading a great book about change. It is called "Switch: How to Change Things When Change is Hard," by Chip and Dan Heath. I am only about 1/4 of the way through it, but in just that little bit of reading I have learned a lot about why change is so difficult. I recommend reading the book, I think it will help you.
ReplyDeleteI also recommend looking and looking and looking until you get comfortable that you have bought the right house. I was (and am still) completely comfortable that your dad and I bought the right house, but every now and then I think...but what if we had bought that house on 74th and Grand. Then I remember that the kitchen was way too small and that is something that is a deal killer for me.
It is a big decision but you are doing this at the right time. Interest rates are low and so are house prices, that does not happen at the same time very often. I think you're right to think about how much you can afford. You don't want to be house poor. On the other hand, you want a house that you will be willing to stay in for many years to come. I guess my one piece of advice about picking schools is don't underestimate the importance of a public school district, even if you don't plan on sending your kids to public school. The quality of the schools in your neighborhood will do more for the stability of housing prices than any other single factor.
Have a good time looking. As your walking through houses look for little decorating ideas that you like in each house and collect them for when you have your own house. That'll make each house fun to explore, whether or not you want that house.
It's an exciting time, but I understand why it is nerve wracking. You'll do great and find the perfect home for you, Scott, and your family.
Roberta
I mean picking houses...not schools. Oops...
DeleteI want you guys to have a home so you can start a family! (hint hint)
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
I remember having similar money issues when it came time to pay tuition. Such a huge chunk of change that takes so long to make gone in the blink of an eye.
ReplyDeleteYou'll be fine. You guys have your heads on straight and are not just being crazy. Like you said it is a STEP.
Guess what, there will be another one after this. :-)
Good luck, we love you!